Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we’re covering failed romantic gestures, Oscar stuff, hamburgers and sex, and more. Your letters: Steven: I stumbled across this when wondering who Russell Wilson followed on Twitter. How is this a thing? It seems to be an Austrian company, but the website says it’s sold in Albertsons on the West Coast. From the Product Benefits section of the website: “With its unique shape, Eat the Ball attracts kids, young people and trendsetters. It aims to bring the topic of bread back onto the front pages, and makes bread a cool and exciting topic for our target market.” Advertisement And somehow, the copy gets even weirder. Look at this! THE BREAD OF A NEW GENERATION Thanks to its unique shape, unsurpassed flavor, its all-natural ingredients and extraordinary shelf life, Eat the Ball is making the concept of bread more exciting and interesting than ever. Advertisement Okay, first of all: Bread doesn’t need a new generation. It’s bread. It’s been around in its current incarnation for many generations already, and all of those generations have loved it. That’s how battle-tested bread is. Secondly, I…